toblameforit | (no subject)

"Now that you've said that, I won't."

"And now that you've -"

Cal stops.

"This could go on forever."

"At this point he'll probably just flip a coin."

Cal can't resist.

"Not now he won't."

"I know he's not watching," Tony says triumphantly, "because he didn't just call you to tell you what a jerk you are."

Cal looks at the phone still in his hand.

"Saving it for later," he decides.

(Sherlock must be busy right now.)

"Or maybe he has better things to do," Obadiah suggests.

Cal can't stop himself from glancing up from the phone, a sharply evaluating look, trying to catch a hint of what that might mean from Stane's expression.

He realizes in the next second what he's doing and looks up at the ceiling.

". . . no hints, Jarvis?"

Shit. He's been doing so well, too.

"Sherlock is not currently accessing the video feed from this room," he says in his machine-perfect deadpan.

Tony laughs.

Cal sprawls back against the couch, trying to recover his cool.

(And maybe, a little, to distract Stane.)

"That was a pretty big hint," he observes.

(It works. It works quite well, actually.)

"Jarvis has a screwy sense of humour."

Cal locks his hands behind his head

(just to be sure)

saying,

"Yeah, I can't really see you programming a boring AI. It wouldn't fit in here."

(It's going to be a very long, very hot shower. Creating this particular distraction on his own terms still comes with its own very special level of gross.)

"Nothing I make is ever boring," Tony agrees.

Obadiah chuckles.

Just in case Cal's skin wasn't crawling before, it is now. He makes himself hold the position for another second before casually shifting back to the way he was sitting before.

"No kidding," he says. "My car keeps doing new things."

"Yeah, I put a couple good tricks in there. I promise you're not gonna, like, hit the wrong button and fly to Mars, though."

Cal blinks at this idea, then laughs.

"Good," he says. "I don't think Peter would accept that excuse."

"I mean, trust me, if I could build a car that doubled as a spaceship, I would. But we're not quite there yet."

"I bet you get there first," Cal says.

"Oh, no shit I will."

"There's the Stark ego we all know and love," Obadiah says fondly.

"I'd be confused if it didn't show up."

He's speaking to Stane, but still looking at Tony.

"Gotta keep up the family tradition of making physicists cry."